If you are a parent-to-be or a couple awaiting the birth of your baby via surrogate mother, you will want to prepare for the new arrival just as you would if traditional means for bearing a child were being used. Just because you are having a surrogate baby doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have a baby shower or stock the nursery. For some parents, things don’t seem real until the baby is actually home. This is because another person has carried it in her womb for nine months. Reality sinks in when the baby is home with his or her new parents, who are getting up each night for feedings.
For couples who want to have a baby but cannot, gestational surrogacy is probably the best choice if adoption has been ruled out as a choice. Unlike traditional surrogacy, gestational surrogacy uses the procedures of in-vitro fertilization (IVF) and embryo transfer (ET.) The sperm and egg from the parents are combined in a laboratory and transferred to the surrogate mother. Things will be monitored very carefully before and during pregnancy. The surrogate mom will have her medical costs paid for during all stages including the postpartum period.
Many couples don’t like to announce the pregnancy or begin purchasing nursery items until at least three to four months gestation. The most common time for miscarriage is during the first three months. The baby becomes stronger during the second trimester and miscarriage is far less likely at this point. Whether or not you send out announcements or quietly inform friends and family is up to you. Those close to you should be told about the surrogacy as soon as possible as they can lend support and caring. For both the mother and the parents, waiting for the baby to be born can be a time fraught with anxiety.
It is important not to become overly stressed when awaiting your surrogate baby. This is especially important for the surrogate mother. Expectant mothers should avoid stress at all costs so the baby will be as healthy as possible. Surrogate mothers are also usually directed how and what to eat, told what activities they can and cannot do, and advised on other ways to have a healthy pregnancy and delivery. All the care and education available for surrogate mothers and expectant parents can help ease anxieties that arise while awaiting the new arrival.